I LOVE weddings. The only hangover I’ve ever gotten from a wedding wasn’t even my fault – it was the first time I’d ever seen an ice sculpture of a tree with branches made of vodka bottles. It was also the only time I ever woke up next to a bridesmaid. Sometimes, even the worst hangovers are worth having.

Did I mention I LOVE weddings? First of all, I look damn good in a suit or a tux, if I do say so myself. I’m like a human coat hanger. I hate dressing up for any reason, but I never complain about throwing on a nice suit for a wedding. Women check me out much harder and much longer than they do in my everyday clothes. As in, they actually check me out, period. Guys appreciate this much more than women, I guess because it happens with so much less frequency. Women get checked out every day. Even a good-looking dude only gets checked out occasionally – at least, this dude only does. Putting on a suit and feeling attractive to women is hardly a bad way to spend the evening in my book.

By the way, these feelings do not extend to the bachelor party. I HATE bachelor parties. I’ve tried ‘em all, too: the wild weekend in Vegas, the local strip club, the overnight fishing trip… Contrary to male tradition, I can’t think of a worse plight than a room full of guys with plenty of time, booze and the obligatory female nudity on their immediate horizon. Shoot me, please, if I ever attend another bachelor party.

Getting dressed up is hardly the primary reason I LOVE weddings. There’s the free food, there’s the open bar, there’s the lovely setting (usually)… But those aren’t the main reasons, either. I love weddings because of the women. Beautifully coiffed, elegantly dressed and oozing with joy, women at weddings are women at their best. Their smiles are as bright as they are relaxed. Their eyes twinkle like Christmas lights. Their skin glows. They flirt with you. They dance with you. They drink too much champagne and come on to you a little stronger than they’ll care to remember the next day. Unless I’m half of a plus one, the single best reason to attend a wedding for me is the women – although the shrimp is usually pretty good, too.

By the way, NOBODY has a love to envy… That’s right up there with the soul mates and Valentine’s Day. Beyond that, don’t we just hate jealousy and envy? Especially our own? One thing guys never envy is another guys’ relationship. We don’t care if Jane Austen penned the back story. We’re not that deep. We envy much closer to the surface – abs, cars, money… These are the trappings of another man’s life we crave. These are the items we long for when we don’t have them ourselves.

There is one more reason to LOVE weddings – it’s the spirit. The human spirit at weddings is the human spirit at its best. People fall in love all over again at weddings. Children get to be grownups and everyone else feels young again. The best weddings, like the one you just attended represent the spirit of love more than any other day in a person’s life. Even after being divorced many years now, I still say my wedding day was the best single day of my life. The marriage may not have lasted forever, but I’ll never forget how good everything in my life felt and looked on that day.

Don’t feel bad about your wedding hangover. Every man and woman deserves to have a wedding day some time in their life. Until you have yours, you may have to learn to live with the occasional hangover.