The Naked Truth
November 27th, 2009Boy, I don’t know where to start…
I guess let’s start with the party thing. I completely agree with you. Parties suck. I’m definitely more the intimate setting dinner party guy rather than the party guy, but I wouldn’t mind having a keg to myself. I have to admit though, what I do love about parties are the women. You know, “those” women. The ones who came to the party hoping to meet “the guy of their dreams.” The ones whose eyes are constantly moving, scanning the room, looking for signs of life. Oh wait, that’s you. Just kidding. Okay, the ones like your skinny friend.
It’s funny that you use the word “skinny” with such reverence. Has “skinny” really ever been a good thing? Does “skinny” conjure up any images worth conjuring? Has any man ever sat with his buddies, burgers and fries and beers scattered about the table, and glowingly described the woman of his dreams as “skinny?” Do us both a favor; recognize the word skinny for what it truly means to a man — the same thing as the word fat… well, almost.
I also have to laugh at the visual of you and “skinny,” surrounded by men, most of them sizing her up as the conquest of a lifetime, the remaining wondering, “what’s her story?” referring to you in their wonder. Hey, I’ve been that guy before… in my younger days. Two women walk into a party, both pretty, one ten pounds up, the other ten pounds down. Who drew my attention? Ten pounds down, every time.
But that was a lifetime ago. A man needs to be young and shallow these days to think “skinny” is a woman worth his attention… young and shallow meaning under 80 years old and using Rogaine for that spot in the back, but you get my drift. And I doubt this is just indicative of where we live. I’d guess this scenario plays out in every city in America that ends in “ville.” It simply is what it is: A skinny woman will draw more attention than her slightly curvier counterpart. Men are mostly the same, present company excluded… Fully grown, yet still a teenager between the legs, lack of spontaneous combustion capability notwithstanding.
What you have to understand is that you are not the same as every other girl… you’re simply not, and it has almost nothing to do with the physical. Your greatest asset is also your greatest curse… your mind. If only I could convince you to transport your heart and psyche to the same place as that rapid-fire processor between your ears, you’d be in business (although our blog might no longer be). The bottom line is this; forget “skinny,” and “almost skinny,” and “skinnier than….” You are a bad-ass chick who loves her independence, respects a man who can keep up and will never lower the bar in order to raise the odds. Plus, all my friends think you’re hot. This is your reality… it could be a hell of a lot worse.
He didn’t really ask you if your skinny friend liked him, did he?
