Double My Pleasure?
I have a date this week – with two guys. Okay, technically I have a blind date with one guy, but I haven’t met the other guy either, so… you get where this is going.
A girlfriend and I are going out with a friend of hers and he’s bringing a friend of his to meet her. Do you follow? She’s calling it an “informal set up, no pressure for any of us.” I call it a double blind date.
Now, I make it a habit never to say yes to blind dates. Not because I have any aversion to meeting someone new, but this situation never ends well for the fixer-upper. Either I don’t like him, he doesn’t like me, whatever, but at the end of the scenario, one or both of us turns to the one who fixed us up and says, “What the hell were you thinking?”
My friend told me that she went out with (my) guy a long time ago and wasn’t interested, so now they’re just friends. But of course, she thinks I’ll totally like him. Tell me again why I would like him if you don’t? I’ve always loved this line: “He’s not my type, but I think he might be yours.” Yeah, that’s what every girl wants – the fish her friend hooked and tossed back. And when I ask why she didn’t like him, her voice gets a little higher and her head cocks to the side. “I’m not really sure — I just have a feeling you might really like him. We were just meant to be friends anyway.”
Uh, huh. I can spot this pitch a mile away. It’s a knuckle-ball, and it lands in the dirt.
So here’s my fear. What if I like the guy who’s supposed to be her date? Knowing myself like I do (like we all do by now), is there really any doubt that I’m probably going to look right past my date and want hers? If I was a betting girl (and I am but that’s a story for later) I would say chances are pretty likely. I’m still that 10 year-old kid who traded her lunch at school. My best friend’s peanut butter sandwich wasn’t ever any different than mine, but it was hers, so it automatically tasted better. It tasted better every time. And since she hasn’t taken a bite out of her sandwich yet, I’d say the trade is still active.
Only one way to find out. Batter up.
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The Daily Double
I’m confused… all this carefully crafted maneuvering, yet I don’t see anybody getting laid in this situation.
BTW, you are so right about blind dates. No matter how or with whom, they’re always nothing better than just another blind date. And please, I really don’t want to hear about the friend or cousin or brother who met his or her spouse on a blind date. Good for them. I couldn’t be happier. But there’s no debate. 99.9% of the time, the blind date we’re thinking about sampling will be just the same as every other blind date we’ve ever been on – unsuccessful. You know it and I know it.
Here’s something I love about you. You know as strongly as I do that blind dates are a guaranteed regret, on hold until the next day when somebody asks, “So… how was your blind date?” Still, you’ll take a flyer on one every now and then because you also believe in the randomness and power of love.
The whole “leftover” concept is a little different for guys, though… First off, we don’t (at least us smart ones) go on double blind dates, ever. A DOUBLE blind date? When I hear that, I immediately think double hernia. The other part, I understand better. Not the whole peanut butter sandwich thing so much… I never liked the lunch in my own brown bag, but I liked my friend’s contents even less. But I do get the part about tasting the portion of her meal that she had pushed to the side of her plate much earlier in the meal. How good could it be? She didn’t like it enough to finish. I’m living my version of this right now, as a matter of fact. In my version, the woman I’m dating, with great joy and enthusiasm, might have had sex with a friend of mine. I like this woman, but I sure don’t like thinking a friend of mine may or may not have had sex with her. I want to know, but I don’t want to know. Just like you and the leftover portion at the dinner table on your double blind date.
I guess the next step is also the same for both of us… We’ll see.
